The Funny


16
Mar 10

Mutant Powers for All

Today scientists unleashed another horror unto the world; X-Men style regenerative powers via genetic manipulation. So I’ve decided to conduct my own experiment with probable unwanted effects too; prolonged sleep deprivation + keyboard + internet – reading the full article because it’s boring = this post Let’s see where it takes us. Well done science, [...]


24
Jan 10

5 Reasons Avatar Kicks Your Old Best Experience In the Head and Farts In Its Eyes

Atlantis, if something I’m about to make up is to be believed (hint: it is), was the land of an ancient civilisation of super-beings from space, who governed the Earth fairly by showing preference for humans who could fly. No humans could fly, so it was a time of great suffering for humanity. Before sinking [...]


14
Jan 10

5 Ways You Can Tell Hollywood Has Given Up

5. Remakes of Remakes … of Remakes Treasure Island is like Hollywood’s whore, we get that. It’s okay to “re-imagine” this every so often, and pass it around like a crying Philapino maid, we’re cool with that, apparently. But remaking a remake just five years after the remake, and pretending said remake never happened, that [...]


18
Nov 09

New Management

Since we’re not allowed to carry liquids onto planes, take pictures of our law enforcement, or not be randomly tasered, I’m guessing the terrorists won, you know, on account of all the terror everywhere.


22
Sep 09

The Answer

In your late 20′s / early 30′s? Don’t know what to do with your life, but know that it’s not whatever you’re doing right now? Why not go back into education?! Please excuse the addition of an exclamation mark directly following the question mark, but punctuation be damned, this is your life man, and if [...]


7
Sep 09

Digital Fortress — A Review

I love Dan Brown books. I love them for the same reason people love Eastenders; I love them because I’m mostly an idiot. Admittedly I’ve only read two and a half, but this is the Internet, so that makes me a professor of Brownonian studies (with offices next to the enormous scatology department, due to [...]


2
Sep 09

6 People Londoners Love to Hate

You may think that only the intellectually bereft use lists for an article’s structure, however if Cracked.com has taught us anything, it’s that this is true. Admittedly, that wasn’t a good use of the word “however”. However, it stands. There are many jobs in London that only the brave, intelligent, and strong charactered are up [...]


30
Aug 09

Blue Toothed Blads

Hanlon’s Razor states;

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

The existence of mobile phone shop employees poses a problem then.


23
Aug 09

A Short History of Covering Nearly Everything

Those aren’t inept female ninjas, they are merely woman wearing burkas, the literally must have fashion item in Islam right now (and the past 500 years).